What is important to you in a relationship?

The following list includes different things that may be important in a romantic relationship. Rate each one from 1-4 based on how important it is to you.

1=very important, 2=important, 3=kind of important, 4=not important at all

Communication 1 2 3 4
What your family thinks 1 2 3 4
What your friends think 1 2 3 4
Honesty/trust 1 2 3 4
Good looks 1 2 3 4
Having fun together 1 2 3 4
Partner popularity 1 2 3 4
Spending time together 1 2 3 4
Emotional support 1 2 3 4
Sex 1 2 3 4
Understanding 1 2 3 4
Caring about each other’s feelings 1 2 3 4
Having time apart 1 2 3 4
Being faithful 1 2 3 4
Sharing the same interests/values 1 2 3 4

Look at your list and circle the things most important to you (#1’s). Cross out the things that aren’t important (#4’s).

A Healthy Relationship

A healthy relationship should ALWAYS include the following:

Respect means acting in ways that show you value your partner. You listen to his/her ideas even when they are different than yours. You care about his/her feelings, and try not to hurt him/her in any way.

Space for a YOU, a ME, and an US. This means that you don’t feel pressured to spend all of your time together.

Understanding means that you think about your partner’s feelings and you care about how your behavior might affect him/her. You accept the differences between you.

Communication is the key to any relationship. You can tell your partner what you need or how you feel. You feel safe expressing your opinions, thoughts and feelings about things.

Safety If you are not happy in the relationship and want to end it, you are safe to do so. You NEVER feel threatened or at risk of danger in your relationship.

Provided by: Planned Parenthood of New York City